![]() ![]() But Minnies mother lied: Minnie spends the entire ceremony glaring laser-beam eyes at Theodores stupid stomach, thinking its really appropriate that hes named after the fat chipmunk. Minnies mother told her that, when the wedding started, Minnie would forget the crinoline itched and just be happy to see her big sister get married to Theodore. “Its not pink, its cranberry wine,” Jennifer said, but Minnie, whose big brother, Mike, tells her about all the horror movies he watches, thinks she looks like someone dumped a bucket of pigs blood on her. Theres a thing called a crinoline and she has to remember to always cross her legs and its a total pain in her twelve-year-old ass. ![]() Her feet throb in shoes that are a size too small, Mary Janes dyed special to match the totally rancid dress Minnies big sister, Jennifer, picked out just for her. Her ponytail is so tight her forehead aches. Clintons Kill, New York Minnie graves is a bridesmaid. ![]()
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